Keliah's Commentary: Total Eclipse of the Heart 10/5/11

Lordy, what a show, what a show for October 5. If OLTL does not win an Emmy for outstanding daytime drama next year, there is no justice in the world. Let’s discuss, shall we??? Proceed with caution…

First things first: Liam is just the most adorbs baby ever, no??? Those big brown eyes and cherubic cheeks just melt me each time I see him. What amazes me though is that Natalie never asks herself why tha HELL her kid has dark hair and brown eyes, why she has flaming red hair and blue eyes and why Brody is a blue eyed blond… How so, yo??? How so??? Granted, I’ve been out of college a few years, ergo my knowledge of all things science, though it SHOULD be up to par, is in fact not as it once was. But if I’m not mistaken, a Natalie + a Brody does NOT = a Liam, correct??? And yet, no one has asked themselves that question??? Maybe they’re too hypnotized by his cherubic beauty that they just don’t care. Totally. Understandable.

And of course Jessica isn’t telling what she knows. She wants Brody to be happy, so I totally appreciate her valid reason. At least it wasn’t something dumb or insipid. And I really liked their conversation and I really liked that I could feel the connection to Brody/Jess of yore…

SAM!!!!!!! SO CUTE! SO PRESH!!!! Just sitting at the counter having a midnight snack!!! LOVE!!! He’s so grown. His buddy John shows up and Sam is on duty as he should be! And did ya’ll peep his green jammies and house sneakers??? Fly yo! Very fly! He and John are so cute together, I loved when he gave him that gift. John looked so proud to be wearing it at the po-po station, ya’ll, I just wanted to jump through my TV and give him a bear hug. To balance it out, I’m going to need some Todd/Sam scenes, STAT. These two men and this kid have some charisma that is just unmatched on any other show I’ve seen in years, in the instance of adults heavily interacting with children his age.

Anyway, all was going so well till Jack the ruiner showed up. (No, “ruiner” is not an actual, definable word, but I’ve already forced it out, so… just deal with it.) But at least he was nice to Sam before he sent him off to bed and didn’t once again tell him that his SpideyBFF killed his dad. That wasn’t cool the first time around. I wanted to clock Jack upside the head something truly serious then! Then again, all the other hits didn't improve him. Hmm... At least today he wasn’t yelling like a maniac and was actually a bit more subdued in his scenes with both John and James. (That is saying something, TRUST!) I wonder if that was just from good direction??? Jill Mitwell, who directed today, deserves some major kudos for the blocking!

Speaking of James, he wants to help his girlfriend and by doing so, he lied to that smartass Jack to get him to confess that he was lying about having seen Todd kill Victor. Even James almost got the kid to crack, but that was of course thwarted by the damn news interruption. I mean seriously, the fuck??? I just need Jack to stop being such a giant douche and start talking about his real problems with Todd. It is about so much more than Victor, I am utterly convinced. Everyone should be by now. I just need Jack to say this aloud and to his dad. Here’s hoping that Scott Sickles, who I’ve been told penned the show today, will continue to do so much more often than not. Perhaps with the online version as well??? I really loved what he penned today. I mean, really. I was energetic about the entire show and it’s cohesiveness and I did not feel bored or FF one thing. Beautiful. Okay, getting off track. Anyway, I can roll with James trying to help Starr. Totally. Dude is trying to be a bit of a badass like his girlfriend who’s currently sitting behind bars for holding up two po-po in what appears to be her current cell, which once belonged to Daddy... Very "Adam's Family Values". I get that Starr is a mommie and has other responsibilities like taking care of her child, but I admit, I love her in ‘don’t fluck with me or my family’ mode. THIS is the girl I remember. James will love her more for it, I'm sure, if he takes the time to get to know her. She might be able to teach him a thing or two.

Anyway, was I like, the ONLY one who kept thinking Red Lobster when I saw James’s shirt, instead of Red Lion, or whatever??? Yes??? Hmm. Perhaps I was just hungry earlier.

Natalie and Jessica continue to be civil since the big fat Buch Twin Hoe-Down/Throw-Down of 2011. I admit, that is always appreciated. John and Natalie are still so in love with each other, it’s almost painful to continue watching them pretend as if they don’t care about each other while longing for one another in the other's presence. When Natalie said that she had to get home to Brody and Liam, her family, there was a look on John’s face that screamed, at least to me anyway, “I wish that could’ve been me…it should've been us...” I need them back together, like, NOW! I’ve seen people say they see chemistry with John and Tea. I don’t see it. But I DO see chemistry between Tea and… and… Tomas. Like, that inappropriate chemistry that people who play siblings or relatives onscreen shouldn’t have. But I’m just going to fanwank it. How about we just un-Delgado him and pretend that this whole brother/sister thing was just in name only, and they are not blood related??? I mean, hey, it worked for Tina and David, for awhile… anyway.

And now… for the portion of the show that left me totally verklempt. Totally and utterly verklempt, I tell you!

BLAIR FOUND TODD IN THE CABIN AND THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD, YA’LL! She panicked. She freaked. She cried. She checked for his pulse. She couldn't find one. She lay her head on his chest. She touched his hair. She stroked his face. He opened his eyes. Something about Blair’s touch always seems to send a jolt through him and he rises from the dead each and every single time, like a phoenix from the ashes, right on cue. Remember when Marty and Todd’s plane went down? And Todd had passed out, and Marty was trying to wake him up? She couldn’t, but the moment Blair had gotten to him, all she had to do was touch his face, and his eyes opened for her. Of course, he had to touch her face to make sure that she was real and in front of him… that’s just how they roll, ya’ll. BIG PIMPIN! Anywho…

Ya’ll, was it wrong that I burst out laughing when Blair accidentally slapped the pillow that she had placed on Todd's chest to stop the bleeding??? I think that was a total accident by KDP and RH just rolled with it. That portion of the scene was very well played, especially since I don’t think it was scripted in the least. I think she even covered her face because she laughed or was about to laugh!

And then Blair just had to ask why he called her and not someone else. And I was ready to snark and sneer and get upset at whatever dialog that was going to be penned for them because I thought, 'I’m just not that lucky'. And then Todd said, “Cause you’re the one, Blair… you’re the one…” And then, I just about died from the unbelievably of what I was actually hearing and watching. And then I was thinking, 'okay, yes, that’s good. Very, very good. We’re getting something here. We’re getting something significant… so clearly, it’s bound to go downhill'… and then… AND THEN?!??!?!?? This shit happened…

Blair: Todd, we’ve gotta take your shirt off.

Todd: You first.

Blair: Come on.

Todd. Just sayin… missed you. Don’t see you for 8 years. This is not exactly how I pictured a reunion.

Blair: Me either… me either…

Ahem. Lordy. They've each thought about the reunion, obviously. Todd was flirting quite nicely. I could go 2 million ways with what I think they pictured the reunion being like. Ahem. Didn’t involve GSWs and pounds of blood, though it did require some physical activity, so either way, the sweat was going to happen. Oh please, DON’T ACT LIKE YOU WEREN’T THINKING IT! Ahem. Anyway, by then, I was already spent. And then… This shit happened:

You sliced me open... who knows what you did to my insides. Oh, you already know Todd. You. Already. Know. Catch that double meaning??? Mmm-hmm.

Before that moment, I quickly remembered why I couldn’t, nor wouldn’t ever jump ship with these two. Why RH and KDP are natural in their element with one another, and why they are just phenoms with acting chops and chemistry to rival any SUPERcouple out there. I must admit, as a Sonny/Brenda (GH) fan who felt that the thrill was gone before they even hit the sheets, today’s Todd and Blair scenes proved to me that all hope was not lost for the Golden Era SUPERcouples, especially when done right. You can, indeed, go home again… and should. To Todd, that home is with Blair. That home, that life, IS Blair. She is his wife. His life. His partner in crime. His soulmate. Moments after Blair removed the bullet from Todd’s shoulder (WITH DORIAN’S HELP, YALL! We really need her back, PRONTO!), Todd took her hand as she pulled away from him, slightly whimpered, and moved her hand over his heart, begging her in that strained voice not to leave. And in that moment, I was done for. These two had totally exhausted me emotionally, and I am so ever grateful for it. Blair came up with every excuse imaginable to get out of there for fear of the inevitable, letting her entire guard down with this man she has loved and lost over time spanning nearly two decades, knowing she would never leave him anyway despite it all, and if she did walk out the door, she wouldn’t get far. Say, past the front porch. And he came up with every excuse he could think of to keep her there with him.

Todd: I just don’t want you to leave…

Blair: Okay. I’ll stay…

The look in his eyes just sold it. And with that, Blair was pulled right back in like a moth to a burgeoning flame. And dammit, be honest with yourself. So. Were. You. THIS is Todd and Blair at their best. The writing, the acting, the scene direction, everything was perfect. Dare I say these scenes were better than the epic kiss at the premiere??? Every time I think T&B can’t surprise me and make me love them even more than I already do, they go above and beyond my expectations. I also think that their reconnecting is on another level this time. I don’t know what it is, but much like Roger and Kassie, their connecting has deepened in a way that I’m sure only they can explain. And dammit, if Roger and Kassie don’t have bodies that rival people half their age… like me. I think it’s about time I got KDP on speed dial and asked her a few questions like… how in the HELL do you have a better body than anyone I know in real life???

I think it’s time Todd and Blair hand over the most pathetic award to moi, you think??? I think I’ve officially earned it.

Hope ya’ll enjoyed my recap! If I missed anything, this time in particular, doesn’t mean it wasn’t meant to be… just means I’m too drained from Todd and Blair to remember. Do what I do best and just blame them and their awesomeness.


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